Saturday, October 5, 2019
Otto Von Bismarcks and unification of Germany Essay
Otto Von Bismarcks and unification of Germany - Essay Example True to his word, in 1863, the Poles began to fight for concessions from Russia, The Russians believed that retaining control of Poland was essential to their policy. France stood with the Poles but Bismarck threw his support to Russia forming a friendship relationship with Russia. This was strategic on Bismarck as he felt a free Poland would threaten the Prussian territory. While this was going on, Austria called a meeting of the Germanic Confederation to have the Berman Princes find the best way of preserving a German Confederation. Franz Joseph, the Emperor of Austria wanted the support of the historic dynasties to help in containing liberalism, democratization and socialism. Since Austria had the dominant control in this Confederation, Bismarck did not want the King of Prussia to attend. These two politicians disagreed for some time over the Prussian Kingââ¬â¢s decision, and finally, after much emotion persuasion, the Prussian King did not attend the meeting. Since he was the second most powerful leader, after Austria, no decisions could be made at the meeting. Austria was having problems at home at this time as well so the matter was tabled. This was a victory for Bismarck. Austria seemed to be losing their power as the Margyars, Poles and Czechs were pulling away feeling less important (Gall, 121-148).Next, Schleswig and Holstein was uncomfortable under the Treaty of London of 1852 which put the Dannish King as the Duke of Holstein and the Duke of Schleswig. Schleswig. Schleswig and Holstein were made up mainly of Germans, at least in the south and they resented having a Danish leader. In 1863, Busnarcj exploited the demise of the King of Denmark and joined with Austria in the Danish War putting Schleswig, Holstein and Lauenberg into the Prussian and Austrian control. In 1865, Holstein was put under the Austrian control and Schleswig was controlled by Prussia. This was a big step forward for Bismarck. Through all of this Bismarck was constantly trying to persuade the Prussian kind to put
Friday, October 4, 2019
Planning a Training Program Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words
Planning a Training Program - Essay Example Making crochet starts with learning about chain stitching. At the second phase, the trainees will be provided training about ââ¬Ëhow to stitchââ¬â¢. Chain stitching is a needlework stitching method in which a chain design is developed from twisted stitches. It is considered as a traditional craft method. Chain stitching does not necessitate needle badge and due to this reason, the stitch is considered as actual surface embroidery on complete fabric. In this phase, the trainers will learn about making curved line and numerous sewing patterns.à Two significant trainings will be provided in this stage, one is hand stitching and the other one is machine stitching technique. Hand stitching will be the fundamental training for developing crochet. After acquiring complete grasp of hand stitching, the trainees will know about how to do machine stitching as an advanced stitching technique. It is considered as a faster as well as more secured stitching method. Third Stage: Single Croc hetIn the third stage, the learners will be provided training about how to make single crochet. Single crochet is one of the most vital phases for learning crochet because without it no one will be able to prepare the double crochet properly and the whole training will become a chaos. The single crochet training will instruct the following aspects:â⬠¢Ã Method of implanting the crochet hookâ⬠¢Ã Method of yarningAfter completely understanding the process of single crochet, the trainees will be provided teaching about conducting the dual crochet.... several types of hooks, yarns, and threads Recognizing the uses of other significant components such as scissors, safety pins, stitch markers, buttons, and zippers among others Measuring the length and the breadth of crochet that needs to be developed Selecting appropriate needles for crochet and, Calculating number of stitches in crochet Second Stage: Chain Stitching Making crochet starts with learning about chain stitching. At the second phase, the trainees will be provided training about ââ¬Ëhow to stitchââ¬â¢. Chain stitching is a needlework stitching method in which a chain design is developed from twisted stitches. It is considered as a traditional craft method. Chain stitching does not necessitate needle badge and due to this reason, the stitch is considered as actual surface embroidery on complete fabric. In this phase, the trainers will learn about making curved line and numerous sewing patterns. Two significant trainings will be provided in this stage, one is hand sti tching and the other one is machine stitching technique. Hand stitching will be the fundamental training for developing crochet. After acquiring complete grasp of hand stitching, the trainees will know about how to do machine stitching as an advanced stitching technique. It is considered as a faster as well as more secured stitching method. Third Stage: Single Crochet In the third stage, the learners will be provided training about how to make single crochet. Single crochet is one of the most vital phases for learning crochet because without it no one will be able to prepare the double crochet properly and the whole training will become a chaos. The single crochet training will instruct the following aspects: Method of implanting the crochet hook Method of yarning Drawing up the circle Conducting
Thursday, October 3, 2019
Department of Defense Essay Example for Free
Department of Defense Essay Effective organization management is determined by the level and quality of public relations employed by the leadership in it. This has mainly been the case due to the direct demand for organizations to enhance their images to the external world upon which they rely on. Of greater importance are the services industries which directly rely on the consumers perceptions of their services as opposed to direct supply of products. Being considered as a direct intrinsic system to activate their system for external image, most of the leaders have been strongly embarking on it to ensure higher returns for their organizations. Such has been the case with the (DoD) Military Public Affairs system which has greatly tried to integrate itself with the community via offer of different services and direct interlink with them. Community relations objectives Arguably, ethical demands are considered to be intrinsically derived and externally displayed with emphasis on cohesive relations between organizations and the public. Therefore, it originates from the core of the management and effected by the established systems. In the theory of public relation ethics, Albert Sullivan argues that public relations involves a direct internalized system which is expressed externally via direct activities and interlink with the public (Pearson, 1999). Pearson continues to say that ethics begin with the peopleââ¬â¢s minds that must conceptualize it to become part of their system. Military Public Affairs has internalized the system by inculcating it to the immediate internal network necessary to develop the correct culture for the DoD. The Department emphasizes on its commitment to fostering good relations on mutually acceptable terms with the public, at home, and abroad on which the military depends on. Of greater importance is the emphasis by the DoD on the need for holistic adherence to human dignity and sanctity at all times (Department of Defense (DoD), 2007). Though military specialists have been calling for less involvement of the military with the public issues, the department has defied odds and ensured direct interface upon which the public have increasingly been informed on the roles and duties of the department in relation to their security and that of the international community. Besides, the policies of the Department of Defense have increasingly been taught to the public and opened for direct criticism as well as possible recommendations on improvements for the same. Direct support and integration with the community According to Russel (1966), human actions and desires are direct reflections for the sense of mind which is often used to denote the best possible consideration that would guarantee highest returns for them. However, this has been a major center for conflicts between the people and their systems in the society. Russel ethics indicates that external consideration is of essence for extended benefits. However, scholars have argued that care should be taken to reduce the negative effects that result from the actions perceived to be good. As a result, the Department of defense has been supporting organizations through loans and fund-raising. The head of DOD Component Command may provide a limited basis for equipments and logistical support to needy organizations especially those dealing with humanitarian services (Department of Defense (DoD), 2007). Besides, the Department officers have been offering voluntary support to these charitable organizations during their off duty periods to boost their development and human services capacity. The department also offers selective benefits and preferential treatment to specific organizations especially those in military operation regions. To ensure it commits itself to serving the community, the department dissociates itself from involvement and support to partisan political activities (Center and Jackson, 1995). Therefore, this assists it to be highly impartial and more effective in serving the community. Increased information and coordination with the public By the time Pearson wrote down the Public relations theory, it was clear that vast criticism had strongly risen on the implication of truth and direct impacts that resulted from its revelation. However, Pearson regards to truth as the direct mirror that indicates an individual or an organizations consideration necessary for establishing the correct picture is pasted in the respondentââ¬â¢s minds for making the correct decisions. Joint civilian meetings and instantaneous meetings with the management served as a direct platform for the system where most people were able to change their minds about the military as well as improve the direct interlink with the system (Department of Defense (DoD), 2007. Through this system, most people had benefited from assistance scheme of the department. Recently, strong appraisals have been posted to the department for ensuring increased information to the community as it directly provides the officers to the department. Conclusion Effective organization management is determined by the level and quality of public relations employed by its management and leaders. Arguably, this has been the main premises that the department of defense has embarked on to ensure better and effective disposal of its duties. Previously, there was strong misconception between the people regarding the role of military until the DoD moved in to clear its image. The direct interlink of the department by giving back to the community has not only raised the confidence of the people to the system, but also improved the general utility of the department. Organizations should struggle to establish better interlink with their consumers and public. Reference List Center, A. and Jackson, P. (1995). ââ¬Å"Public relations Practices, Upper Saddle, N. J. Prentice Hall. Department of Defense (DoD), (2007). Department of defense directive: Public Affairs Relation Policy, Washington: DoD. Russel, B. (1966). ââ¬Å"The elements of ethicsâ⬠Philosophical essays. London: Longmans, Green. Pearson, R. (1989). Sullivan Theory of public relations Ethics. Public relations review. XV(1989):52-62.
Denture Adhesives in Prosthodontics- An Overview
Denture Adhesives in Prosthodontics- An Overview Dr Ranjith Kumar P, MDS; Dr Shajahan PA,MDS ; Dr Jyothis Mathew, MDS ABSTRACT Denture adhesives are used by an endless number of denture wearers and also by the dentists who fabricate them. Prescribing denture adhesives has been viewed by many prosthodontists as a means of compensating for deficiencies in clinical and technical procedures. Denture adhesives increase retention and thereby improve chewing ability, reduce wobble, improve comfort and confidence and reduce amount of food particles collecting under the dentures. Moreover, they undoubtedly provide the patients an increased sense of security and satisfaction. However, patients should use denture adhesives only on the advice of their dentists. INTRODUCTION Though their usage dates back to the late 18th century, they were first mentioned in dental literature in the 19th century. Earlier adhesives, formulated by mixing vegetable gums absorbed moisture from the saliva and swelled to a mucilaginous substrate that adhered to the mucosa of the mouth and the denture. Kapurââ¬â¢s 1 study in 1967 on 26 denture wearers, concluded that denture adhesives increased denture retention, thereby improving denture wearersââ¬â¢ incisive ability. Stafford and Russell, 2 using radio telemetry, measured the change in pressure, at the denture base-mucosa interface, with and without adhesives and found that denture adhesives allowed greater total occlusal pressure. The denture adhesives improved denture retention and stability (Tarbet et al 3), and found that patients perceived improved chewing ability, confidence and comfort, reduced wobble and collection of food particles under denture. Chew et al 4 determined the effectiveness of denture adhesive in improving the retention and stability of the complete maxillary denture in vivo using Kinseography. Abdelmelak and Michael 5 suggested that the denture adhesives acts as a cushion under complete denture; reducing the transmission of pressure and friction to the underlying mucosa. COMPOSITION The major constituents of denture adhesives can be broadly divided into three groups.6 Group 1 (Adhesive agents): Tragacanth, acacia, pectin, gelatin, methyl-cellulose, hydroxyl-methyl cellulose, Karaya Gum, sodium carboxyl-methyl cellulose and synthetic polymers (polyethylene oxide, acrylamides, acetic and polyvinyl). Group 2 (Anti-microbial agents) Sodium borate, sodium tetraborate, hexachlorophene and ethanol. Group 3 (Other agents) Plasticizers, wetting agents and flavouring agents such as oil of wintergreen, oil of peppermint, etc. Mechanism of Action Denture adhesives are supplied as paste, powder or cream. As the Adhesive powders absorb water, they swell to many times their original volume and the resulting anions are attracted to cations in the mucous membrane proteins. Sticky saliva thus formed increases the viscosity of the adhesive, thereby increasing the denture retention.7 Newer adhesive materials provide stronger bio-adhesive and cohesive forces. Free carboxyl groups formed by the hydration of adhesive such as methyl cellulose, hydroxyl methyl cellulose, sodium carboxyl-methyl cellulose or poly methyl vinyl-ether maleic anhydride (PVM-MA), etc. form electrovalent bonds that produce stickiness or bio adhesion. The increased viscosity of the adhesive creams result in their lateral spread excluding air and saliva thereby increasing the retention 8. Requirements of an ideal Denture Adhesive 9 Available as gels, creams and powders. Nontoxic, non-irritant, and biocompatible with the oral mucosa. It should have a neutral odour and taste. Easy application and removal from the tissue surface of the denture. Discourage microbial growth. Adhesiveness should be retained for 12-16 hrs. Increase the comfort, retention and stability of the denture Mode of application: Any residual adhesive should be removed from the tissue-bearing surface of the denture . The denture bearing tissues are wiped clean of any food debris. Wet dentures before application of adhesive. Small amounts of adhesive is applied to the tissue-bearing surface of denture. In the maxillary denture -Anterior alveolar ridge, the center of hard palate and posterior palatal seal region . In the mandibular denture apply to the sulcus of denture over the crest of the ridge extending from the anterior region sulcus to the distal extension. Denture should be seated and held in place firmly by hand pressure for 5-10 seconds. Gauze is used to remove excess adhesive . Patient is advised to close into centric occlusion several times to spread the adhesive as a thin even layer. Indications. Recording jaw relations and denture try in should be done using stable and retentive bases. The use of denture adhesive can stabilize the trail denture bases which show inadequate retention and stability due to various reasons. Use of adhesive will improve the accuracy of the denture try-in, and also decrease the patient apprehension about the fit of the final prosthesis. Use of adhesives in patients with compromised denture bearing areas adds to their confidence thereby increasing the ability to adapt to the new prosthesis. Immediate denture get loosened soon due to soft tissue healing and bony resorption requiring relining, rebasing, or a new denture fabrication. A soft liner used to augment the retention; comfort and function during the interim period are aided by the use of a denture adhesive. Reduced clinical findings of ulcers, tissue irritation, compression, and inflammation of the oral mucosa of denture wearers were seen with concomitant use of adhesives. Xerostomia in denture wearers either drug or radiotherapy induced can be alleviated with the use of denture adhesives. Stabilization of dentures in patients with hormonal changes and neuromuscular disorders such as myasthenia gravis, Parkinsonââ¬â¢s and Alzheimerââ¬â¢s disease, etc., can be achieved with denture adhesives. Prosthesis to rehabilitate gross maxillofacial defects requires denture adhesives for retention. Denture adhesives are valuable adjuncts to the retention of radiation carriers or radiation protection prostheses. Usage of minimal amounts of adhesives provides high profile patients like attorneys, executives, speakers, etc. with psychological security in social situations. Contraindications Allergies to denture adhesives or any of its components. Gross inadequacies in retention and function. Excessive bone resorption and soft tissue shrinkage leading to loss of vertical dimension. Adhesives should not be used to retain fractured dentures or dentures with missing flange or with sectional fractures. Patients with inability to maintain proper hygiene of the denture should avoid use of denture adhesive. Conclusions Denture adhesives, when used properly are safe and beneficial to the patient in increasing retention and stability, enhanced comfort, improved function, and in providing psychological satisfaction. They should not be used as an aid to compensate for denture deficiencies even though adhesives enhance denture performance. Patients should not use denture adhesives inadvertently without proper guidance and instructions from the dentists.
Wednesday, October 2, 2019
The Problem Of Domestic Violence :: Violence Against Women Essays
A problem has become known and to many, they feel that it's about time that the general public has taken notice. This problem has been a taboo for centuries and in the mid nineties it has chosen to let itself be known, the problem that I am talking about is domestic violence, it has ruined families, and demoralized the victims for years and now because of the "trial of the century" we finally are allowed to discuss it in detail, without fear of reprisal, now we get to familiarize ourselves with it and eventually after we get to know all about it we can, through treatment, get rid of it. In this paper, I will discuss problems with the so called epidemic of domestic violence. This entire paper will be about domestic violence, and because of that I feel it is important to note that "in most families men and women do not engage in physically abusive behavior" (The Brown U.), but because the media feels that it is their public duty to deceive us into believing that this problem is an "epidemic" (Domestic V.) we feel that, that is the case. Webster's dictionary defines epidemic as "a rapid spreading of a disease; to many people at the same time", this is not the case with domestic violence, one it didn't just happen overnight, it has just been popularized overnight, domestic violence has been going on from as far back as anyone can remember and probably farther than that, and two, this is not affecting many people at the same timem, because, as I've stated before, "in most families men and women do not engage in physically abusive behavior". If you as the reader gets anything out of this paper, it is important to me as the writer, that you find that, while domestic violence is a major problem for some families, it is by no means an epidemic. The major reason domestic violence has become so widespread over the last couple of years is because of the O. J. Simpson trial, as one person put it "the O. J. Simpson case would do for domestic violence what Anita Hill did for sexual harassment" (Domestic V.). The trial of the century brought a much needed attention to a issue that for too long was pushed to the back burner; domestic violence was a major issue in the case and it became evident, through the mass publicity of the case, that women weren't crying wolf all these years, because of "the murder of Nicole Brown ... the media would focus squarely on and
Essay on Imagery, Language, and Sound in Whats That Smell in the Kitch
Imagery, Language, and Sound in What's That Smell in the Kitchen? Marge Piercy is an American novelist, essayist, and poet best known for writing with a trademark feminist slant. In "What's That Smell in the Kitchen?" Marge Piercy explores the way women are sometimes held in low esteem by men through the eyes of a tired housewife who has had it with her monotonous day- to-day duties. In this poem, it is not stated that the speaker is a homemaker, but the reader is told about one woman in particular who is meant to express the feelings of women as a whole. The author conveys this central idea through imagery, figurative language, and devices of sound. In the first lines of "What's That Smell in the Kitchen?" the author makes her point that women are burning dinners all over America. This gives us a general idea of what the poem will be about, yet it makes us want to read on to see why this would be happening; in other words, it triggers our curiosity. The author goes on to describe foods that are common to certain cities in the United States, bringing about a very gustatory and olfactory image in the mind of the reader. Following this, the author uses repetition to emphasize her introductory statement yet again, and adds an additional phrase, ". . . women are burning/food they're supposed to bring with calico/smile on platters glittering like wax." This statement is somewhat ironic, because it conveys an image of a very "false" woman, something like a mechanical doll or robot, or even like the flawless "model mom" figure of June Cleaver of the television series "Leave it to Beaver." Not only do we picture a woman in an apron with an artificial smile but Piercy alludes... ...ch can be interpreted as "Once I was first-rate with all the trimmings but now I'm low-class junk." Spam is a cheap processed meat whereas roast duck is assumed to be one of the best meats there is; therefore she has been cheapened or degraded by the lack of gratitude on the part of her spouse, and society. She is expressing the fact that society expects women to play the role of "little wife" with no concern for the individual's own interests. Also, the woman in the poem is comparing her drive to food, and since this poem is image-laden with war and food, we can say that Piercy is writing of a war with food, where women are using food as their primary weapon against men (the way to a man's heart is through his stomach!) It is in this way that Piercy develops her view that women are the lesser gender in the eyes of men and shares her refusal to conform.
Tuesday, October 1, 2019
Thorn Queen Chapter Twenty-Six
It was no secret: my mother hated Otherworldly things. Her feelings weren't that hard to understand, considering that she'd been a prisoner there, serving as Storm King's forced mistress-not unlike my own experiences now. Just as she tried to ignore what Roland and I did for a living, she also tried to ignore the gentry blood in me, treating me as though I were fully human and often refusing to hear otherwise. Therefore, I was a bit surprised that she took everything better than Roland did when we got back to Tucson. I knew they had discussions when I wasn't around. He filled her in on what had happened in Yellow River, how I'd been practicing magic on the sly, and how I was now the reigning monarch of a fairy kingdom. He told her about Leith too. If she was shocked by any of it, if she was repulsed by it and hated me for what I'd becomeâ⬠¦well, she never let on. She was justâ⬠¦well, my mother. She set me up in my old bedroom. It hadn't changed much over the years and even still had the same glow-in-the-dark stars I'd stuck to the ceiling. When I'd put them there in my youth, she had fretted that they'd never come off without ripping out part of the paint. So, I guess she'd never bothered in all these years. Roland knew someone who knew someone who came and did a field surgery on my shoulder, removing the bullet and leaving me with pain meds and antibiotics. That was about all I saw of Roland in those initial days of recovery. It was my mom who stayed with me the most, talking about anything that wasn't Otherworldly and making sure I had entertainment in the form of books and TV. I could pay little attention to those diversions, though, not when my mind was on so many other things. I would turn the events of the previous weeks over and over in my head until I grew too weary to string any coherent thoughts together. When I reached that exhausted point, I would usually just let my mind go blank for a while. It was oddly soothing, particularly since I so often woke up from nightmares about Leith. An empty mind was sometimes welcome. And it was my mother I went to when my period came. She'd already bought a pregnancy test too, just for peace of mind. When it came out negative, I stared sobbing. My mom held me in bed and rocked me the whole time, saying, ââ¬Å"I know, baby, I know.â⬠It was odd because I didn't even know why I was crying. The negative test was a good thing, and I was glad there were no loose ends with Leith. As she held me-the first time I'd really let anyone touch me since Art's house-I suddenly wondered how she had felt when she was pregnant with me. Had she been repulsed by the thought of the half-gentry child forced on her? Had she wanted to get rid of me but been unable to in the Otherworld? I shuddered, not wanting to ponder that too much. Thinking I was cold, she went and got me a sweater. It was a few days later that Roland and I finally talked. I was more mobile then and had come downstairs to make a bowl of cereal in the kitchen. He strolled in and joined me, sitting at the table with his coffee. His face seemed to have more lines than the last time I'd seen him. My fault, no doubt. ââ¬Å"I'm sorry,â⬠I said when the silence grew too hard to bear. ââ¬Å"Iâ⬠¦I should have told you.â⬠He looked up from his cup. ââ¬Å"Which part exactly?â⬠ââ¬Å"All of it. Everything. Iâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ I sighed. ââ¬Å"You were always so mad that I was spending time in the Otherworld at all. I thought you'd be upset if you knew the rest.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh, believe me, I'm much more upset to hear it now than I would have been then.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm sorry,â⬠I said again, not knowing what else to say. ââ¬Å"It all just happened so fast. There was that fight with Aeson-ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"I know, I know. Kiyo gave me the details of that, though he too was a bit surprised to find out you can conjure up hurricanes worthy of Storm King now.â⬠I shook my head. ââ¬Å"I'm a long way from that. And once I started learning the magicâ⬠¦I just can't stop.â⬠Now Roland sighed. ââ¬Å"He's been by a couple of times.â⬠It took me a moment to realize he meant Kiyo, not Storm King. ââ¬Å"I'm not ready to see him.â⬠ââ¬Å"I know.â⬠There was a pause, and I think it took a lot for Roland to say his next words. ââ¬Å"He's not so bad. Relatively speaking.â⬠I gave him a sad half-smile. ââ¬Å"Yeah, he's great.â⬠And I meant itâ⬠¦but something was bothering me about Kiyo, something that kept nudging me in the back of my head. I continued to ignore it. ââ¬Å"So what happens now?â⬠Roland asked. ââ¬Å"What are you going to do?â⬠I stared in surprise. ââ¬Å"Wellâ⬠¦what else would I do? The same thing I've been doing.â⬠ââ¬Å"What, running back and forth between the worlds, trying to act like you have some semblance of a normal life?â⬠The tone of his voice hurt me. ââ¬Å"What do you expect me to do? And it's not like our lives have ever been normal.â⬠He shook his head. ââ¬Å"This is different. You can't do this. You can't literally live in two worlds.â⬠I munched on my cereal for a moment to give me a chance to think. ââ¬Å"I don't really see that I have a choice. That land is bound to me. If I neglect it, it dies.â⬠Roland said nothing. ââ¬Å"Oh, come on! You think I should do that? Abandon it and let all those people suffer? You're as bad as Art.â⬠The mystery of what had happened to Art's body and to Abigail wasâ⬠¦well, a mystery. No one had told me exactly, save that it had ââ¬Å"been taken care of.â⬠Roland's eyes flashed with anger. ââ¬Å"No, I'm nothing like him. Don't ever make that mistake. But the gentry aren't our people. They aren't your people.â⬠ââ¬Å"They are now,â⬠I said, surprising myself. He stood up, his entire posture weary and defeated. ââ¬Å"I don't know what to think anymore. I don't know what to think of you. I don't even feel like I know you.â⬠In all these years together, he'd never raised a hand to me. But in that moment, it was like he'd slapped me. ââ¬Å"What does that mean?â⬠I asked. I meant to sound defiant. Instead, my words came out very small and very scared, much like a pleading child's. I remembered how grateful I'd been to see him at Art's. My father. My protector. ââ¬Å"Do you notâ⬠¦do you not love me anymore?â⬠He'd started to walk away but paused to look back. His blue eyes took me in for several moments. ââ¬Å"Of course. I will always love you. You're my daughter. Butâ⬠¦I'm not sure if things can ever be the same.â⬠Roland walked out of the kitchen, and that's when I realized it was time for me to leave. Tim nearly knocked me over when I got back to my own house. My mom had called him to tell him I was okay when I'd first come to her place, but between my recovery week and the week at Art's with no contact, Tim had done a fair amount of freaking out. ââ¬Å"What happened? Are you okay? I dealt with Lara while you were gone. You would have been proud.â⬠I smiled, more pleased that he'd called her by her first name instead of ââ¬Å"bitch secretary.â⬠ââ¬Å"Do you want me to make you something?â⬠ââ¬Å"You sound like my mom,â⬠I teased. ââ¬Å"Always wanting to feed me.â⬠He shrugged. ââ¬Å"You're too skinny. And I don't say that lightly, considering the kinds of girls I go after.â⬠He was right both about me and his choice in women. They'd fed me at Art's, but I'd hardly eaten any of it. I'd lost a lot of weight, and while part of me wanted to bulk back up by tapping the bag of Milky Way candy bars in my pantry, I knew I should probably be delving into some serious nutrition for a change. So, I dispatched Tim to cook up some steak stir-fry, a request he was more than eager to accomodate. I spent the rest of the day restless and bored, unsure of what to do with myself. I did some laundry, despite Tim's protests that he could do it, and scarfed down lots of his stir-fry. The animals were all there, which led me to believe Kiyo was still staying there too. After I'd refused to see him at my parents', I half-expected him to have moved out. Honestly, I wasn't sure what to do now. I didn't plan on going to the Otherworld anytime soon, and there was no way-as I told Lara later on the phone-that I could take any new jobs for a while. This made both Tim and her nervous about my accounting, but I knew my savings account was at least temporarily secure. My magic I left completely alone. I wasn't going near that, even though there were times the air and the water vapor around me would call to me like a siren's song, and I'd burn to touch them. The one bit of magic I did use was shamanic: I tried to summon Volusian. He didn't come. I wasn't sure what to think of that. I was almost grateful for nightfall so that I could go to bed and stop trying to figure out things to pass the time. I wondered if this apathy was just a natural consequence of the trauma I'd been through, some kind of numbed state. TV, my puzzles, even Tim's cheery chatterâ⬠¦none of it could hold my attention. I wasn't bored, exactly. I just wasn't very engaged with the world. That night, just as I used to do, I dreamed of the Thorn Land. The dream was so vivid and real. It was like I'd stepped outside my own home to go walking in the foothills, like my soul was traveling on without my body. The air was sharp and clean, filled with the fragrance of desert flowers. The sun was warm and merciless-yet comforting in its familiarity. And the colorsâ⬠¦the colors made my dream self want to weep. Peaches and greens and all the colors of the cacti flowers looking up at the clear blue, blue of the sky. For the first time since my capture and rape, I felt at peace. I felt whole and healed in the dream. I woke up with a longing in my chest, like there was a piece of me missing. The sharpness of it startled me-and scared me a little. Tossing on a robe, I made my way out to the kitchen, hoping coffee and breakfast would shake off that all-consuming desire to run to the Otherworld. ââ¬Å"Kiyo,â⬠I exclaimed. He sat at the table with coffee, both dogs at his feet. I had a weird deja vu from coffee with Roland yesterday and suspected there was ââ¬Å"a talkâ⬠in store for me. ââ¬Å"Eugenie,â⬠he said, looking up from the paper. His eyes were warm and chocolate-brown, filled with so much love. He rose from his chair and approached me, arms open. I started to go into his embrace but something made me shrink back, some protective instinct of my body's to keep itself safe. I knew he wasn't Leith. I knew Kiyo loved meâ⬠¦but there was just something within me that was afraid to touch anyone else. My mother was the only one I'd allowed to hug me so far. Sadness and hurt flashed through Kiyo's eyes at my rejection, but he seemed to understand. Awkwardly, he simply gave me a soft touch on the arm, which I allowed with only a slight flinch. We both sat down-after I'd fetched coffee-and he drank me in with those intense eyes, like he hadn't seen me in years. Of course, these last two weeks or so had certainly felt like years to me, so perhaps that wasn't such a bad comparison. ââ¬Å"How are you?â⬠he asked. ââ¬Å"I've missed you so much. I've been so worried.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm okay. I was in good hands.â⬠ââ¬Å"How's your shoulder?â⬠I gave it a slight shrug. ââ¬Å"Stiff. But mending. I could probably go over to the Otherworld and get someone to patch it right up.â⬠His face instantly darkened. ââ¬Å"I think you need to stay away from there for a while.â⬠ââ¬Å"Jesus Christ. Not you too. I'm that land's ruler. I have to go back.â⬠A flash of the dream came back to me. It was more than some subconscious musing, I knew. The Thorn Land and I were tied. We couldn't stay apart. I had known that being away from it would cause it to die, and now I was realizing that I might die without it as well. ââ¬Å"There has to be a way. I was talking to Maiwenn, and she's going to look into it. Surely, somewhere in the pages of their history, someone gave up their kingdom without dying.â⬠ââ¬Å"Is that a good idea?â⬠I asked. ââ¬Å"Me giving it up?â⬠ââ¬Å"Of course,â⬠he said, shocked. ââ¬Å"You've never wanted it. You've said so a hundred times. It'd be better for everyone. The next person bound to the land probably wouldn't transform it into a desert. You'd be free, able to go on with your life here, free of the magicâ⬠¦.â⬠I narrowed my eyes. ââ¬Å"I'll never be free of that either.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yeah,â⬠he agreed, stiffness in his voice, ââ¬Å"but there'll be less temptation outside of the Otherworld. Why the hell didn't you tell me you were learning all that stuff?â⬠ââ¬Å"I did tell you! I told you about Dorian sending Ysabel.â⬠ââ¬Å"What I saw you do in thereâ⬠¦that was nothing like what you said she taught you.â⬠ââ¬Å"It happened fastâ⬠¦I didn't realize it half the time myself, and I didn't want to upset you.â⬠ââ¬Å"No one learns that fast,â⬠he muttered. I remembered Shaya's words. Storm King did. ââ¬Å"Well, I'm apparently not all-powerful. I lost hold of Volusian during that ordeal. He didn't come when I called.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh. I thought you knew.â⬠ââ¬Å"Knew what?â⬠ââ¬Å"He's bound to Dorian now.â⬠I stared for several seconds. ââ¬Å"Oh my God. I thought that might happenâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ Kiyo stared back. ââ¬Å"You did? Then why the hell did you send him to Dorian? Why not send him to warn me?â⬠ââ¬Å"For exactly that reason! If Volusian broke from my control, I knew Dorian could probably bind him.â⬠ââ¬Å"I suppose. But I feel like you've just given Dorian a nuclear warhead.â⬠I didn't say it, but I had a feeling Kiyo was more upset that it was Dorian I'd contacted for help and not him. ââ¬Å"And that's how you found me, right? Volusian told Dorian, who then told you and Roland?â⬠I'd heard it from Roland but wanted to hear it again. Kiyo nodded. ââ¬Å"We'd been looking for you as soon as you disappeared after the battle. None of us had a clue what had happened. We got Roland involved a few days later to help with a hunt in this world, but none of usâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ He shook his head. ââ¬Å"None of us had any idea that that's what had happened to you.â⬠Awkward silence fell, each of us thinking about the things neither of us would give voice to. My imprisonment. My rape. I lowered my eyes, playing with the edge of the coffee cup. The memories were like a rollercoaster. Sometimes they'd sink way down low into the bottom of my mind. Other times, they'd flare up sharply, pushing to the forefront of my mind and unleashing all the dizzying, horrible feelings of fear, violation, and helplessness that ordeal had caused. I suddenly looked up sharply and met Kiyo square in the eyes. ââ¬Å"Why didn't you let me kill Leith when I had the chance?â⬠With a shiver, I remembered the vengeance burning within me and the storm swirling around me. The question clearly caught Kiyo off-guard. ââ¬Å"What? You know why. Because of the political falloutâ⬠¦because you're not the kind of person given to revengeâ⬠¦.â⬠ââ¬Å"Aren't I?â⬠I demanded. I was suddenly angry at him, and it occurred to me right then that I'd been suppressing a lot of it this whole week. ââ¬Å"You have no right to talk about when revenge is right. You didn't go through what I did.â⬠ââ¬Å"I know,â⬠he said, trying to be gentle. ââ¬Å"I don't doubt he deserved a horrible punishment. I can only imagine how it was for you-ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"No. There is no way you can imagine.â⬠ââ¬Å"It's more than just revenge, though. Do you know what's happened in the wake of this? Katrice is massing her armies, Eugenie. The monarchs haven't had an all-out war in ages. This could get very bad. People are going to die. I wanted to save you from thatâ⬠¦wanted to save you from being her target.â⬠ââ¬Å"Alright. Then why didn't you kill him?â⬠Dead silence. ââ¬Å"What?â⬠Kiyo exclaimed at last. I never lowered my gaze, astonished at the coldness in my voice. ââ¬Å"You said he deserved a horrible punishment.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yeah, imprisonment or-ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Imprisonment? Are you crazy? He's a prince. We couldn't have kept him without the same ââ¬Ëpolitical fallout.' He would have walked.â⬠ââ¬Å"Going to war is worse, believe it or not.â⬠ââ¬Å"Then you still should have killed him,â⬠I repeated. ââ¬Å"Everyone keeps going on about how you're ââ¬Ëjust' a kitsune. You aren't technically aligned with anyone. Maybe she would have put a hit out on you, but she wouldn't have gone to war against you alone.â⬠Kiyo's eyes were wide. ââ¬Å"Are you listening to yourself? This is insane! You're condemning me for not killing a man that was on his knees.â⬠ââ¬Å"That man did horrible, awful things. He didn't deserve to walk away unpunished.â⬠Kiyo's shock had given away to anger. ââ¬Å"I can't believe you're holding me responsible for this. And you know what? This is the magic talking. The more of it you use, the more it changes you. This is why you need to stay away from the Otherworld! For your own protection. Before you turn into someone you don't want to be.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh, now you want to protect me! Look, you of all people should understand. I can't stay away from the Otherworld. I can't stay away from this world. I don't belong anywhere! And yetâ⬠¦I belong everywhere. There's no good fit for me. I'm split, Kiyo. I thought you'd get that. You told me before that you did. You're the same.â⬠ââ¬Å"Itâ⬠¦it's different somehow.â⬠ââ¬Å"That's not good enough. You're being a hypocrite,â⬠I exclaimed. ââ¬Å"You make decisions for both of us based on what's convenient at any given time. You think you can handle it one way but that I can't. That's not fair. You can't make different rules for each of us.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm trying to protect you,â⬠he repeated. ââ¬Å"You don't think I'm strong enough to handle the things you can?â⬠He held up his hands. ââ¬Å"I don't know. Maybe I'm the one who isn't strong enough to make the tough decisions.â⬠ââ¬Å"Dorian is.â⬠It was out before I could stop it. Dead silence, round two, descended on us. Kiyo finished his coffee. ââ¬Å"I see. So that's what this is really about.â⬠He stared around, taking in the house and the cats sprawled everywhere. ââ¬Å"Maybeâ⬠¦maybe it's time I pack up my things.â⬠I crossed my arms. ââ¬Å"I think that's a good idea.â⬠ââ¬Å"It might take me a day or two to collect these guys, though.â⬠ââ¬Å"That's fine.â⬠I kept perfect control in my voice, focusing all my energy on sounding flat. If I slipped up, I might start crying or begging him to stay. I might apologize for being so harsh and holding him responsible for not letting me kill Leith. It wasn't fair for me to blame Kiyo and laud Dorianâ⬠¦ â⬠¦and yet I did. Kiyo stood up, saying he'd come back to do a thorough packing when I wasn't around since that might be easier on both of us. I agreed. Tension engulfed us as he moved toward the door. I'd hurt him; I knew it. And truthfully, I didn't fully know if I was making the worst mistake of my life here in breaking up with Kiyo. True, we had been fighting a lot, with him not understanding the choices I'd been having to make. The heart of it was, though, that I felt he'd had the opportunity to protect meâ⬠¦and hadn't. ââ¬Å"Eugenie,â⬠he said, hovering near the back door. ââ¬Å"I know you were hurt. I know you suffered-and still do. And I guess I can see why you think what Dorian did was noble. But it's not. There are big consequences to this, and someday-probably soon-you're going to regret what he did.â⬠I shook my head, still obstinate. ââ¬Å"I don't know. Maybe.â⬠ââ¬Å"No matter what you think of me, it's not too late. You can make amends with Katrice. You can stop this.â⬠There was a desperate, pleading look in his eyes, and I wondered if it was because of his desire for peace or the agony of leaving me. My own hurt over him leaving was steadily growing, but something in his words halted it. ââ¬Å"Make amends? What's that mean?â⬠ââ¬Å"I don't knowâ⬠¦apologizeâ⬠¦blame it on Dorian. Maiwenn might negotiateâ⬠¦.â⬠My anger spun back up. ââ¬Å"I am not going to grovel to the woman whose son raped me. And I'm not going to let Dorian get punished for something I should have done myself.â⬠Maiwenn didn't even deserve mentioning. ââ¬Å"I'll face the consequences, Kiyo. I'm the Thorn Queen.â⬠He gave me a small, sad smile. ââ¬Å"Are you sure? Or are you the Storm Queen?â⬠I frowned. ââ¬Å"What?â⬠ââ¬Å"That's what you told Leith. Back in the kitchen.â⬠ââ¬Å"No.â⬠So much of those memories were fragmented, but I was certain I'd recall that. ââ¬Å"I told him I was the Thorn Queen a few times-but good God. Not Storm Queen.â⬠ââ¬Å"I heard you. Once you said Storm Queen.â⬠I shook my head, anger returning. ââ¬Å"You made a mistake. They sound alike. Easy to mishear.â⬠His smile twitched; his sadness grew. ââ¬Å"Not with my hearing.â⬠Kiyo left after that-to where, I didn't know. It didn't matter. My heart was broken, and thinking about him too much was only going to make things worse. Instead, I knew I had to leave too. I had to get out of here-and I knew exactly where I had to go. I had to go to my kingdom.
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